someone else’s new year

It is all exciting, this new year. 2019. Sarcasm fills me when I think of it. This calendar. The organisation of time. My time. My own sacred marking of days on another mans calendar.

It seems arbitrary to me that January 1st marks the new year. Months named after rulers and kings and deities that are not mine. That the last personal thing is managed and taken from me by the ticking of a clock. A flea snipping at the my flesh. A flea not mine. Even “ticking clocks” are by-the-way.

The un-natural overlay of this modern calendar upon the lives of humanity – used to manage us. To keep us “in line”. Managed. Holidays and remembrances that are not mine. That belong to dead soldiers of wars that I did not fight in; slaughters of humans best forgotten, not revered in the memories of present day drones.

 

 

 

 

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Oh Your God

Go ahead and have your god. But first you must be fair.

With tooth and blade let sinew aside and have your gods heart laid bare.

See there, no justice in its power or love in the policy of pain.

No fairness in this gods mercy nor quench within its rain.

Have your god and bleed your guilt; bend your pious knee.

Hold it close in sabbath page and keep it firm from me.

it eats me.

(C) l. max luttrell 2018

it eats me. from the inside out this annual death. the veil of golden tumors raked into heaps.

hearts hang heavy like thieves on crucifix oaks and alder; pine box funerals in a potters field.

i’m over it. the melancholia and glad sadness words tosses like sorry love in the sink in miserable guilt.

it dies and every year it is the same here. first the supplication to the ritual and then the hard heart of winters promise.

i am broken to it. hardened now against it.

it eats me.

Oracle

“Heed these words, You who wish to probe the depths of nature: If you do not find within yourself that which you seek, neither will you find it outside. If you ignore the wonders of your own house, how do you expect to find other wonders? In you is hidden the treasure of treasures. Know Thyself and you will know the Universe and the Gods.”

– Delphic Oracle

© l. max luttrell